Dear Passengers and Airlines...unfinished

The Rules: passengers

1. Do NOT be a loud talker. Check yourself. Do you hear only your voice?
2. Never put your seat back. Notice there are a total of 16 inches between our heads? I WILL put something gross on the crest of your bald spot.
3. Don't use BOTH arm rest. Everyone only gets ONE. If anyone should get two it is the one in the middle sandwiched between the morbidly obese Hoarder and the BO guy.
4. Use deoderant (why does that word always come up as spelled wrong, with no good explanation?)
5. Don't talk to me.

I sound miserable because I am. This is an introverts nightmare – very good reason for going to the grocery at midnight and catching the red-eye.


The Rules: airlines
1. Offer Dominos pizza and KFC
2. If I pay for luggage, I should get something else...like a luggage tag.
3. Surprise me.
4. Don't make planes with reclining seats unless there is significant room (I should NEVER smell another grown person's follicles).